Channeling Giovanni - Rambling thoughts from outside the cha cha...

Me: Interesting, peculiar, awash in contradiction, sensitive, easily distracted, odd, thoughtful, odd, political, philistine, romantic, laid back, clever, sweet, puppy dog, introspective, hyper, odd, Bohemian, untrendy, jock, and all around good guy.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Web browsers create catfish and jerks

I say this at least once a week.  I am SO glad I'm not single.

Guys online (insert your favorite dating/hookup site here) are complete jerk-wads.  And, the anonymity of the Internet seems to amplify this in people's personalities.  One of my close friends is in the dating scene and is trying to make the online dating thing work.  And failing horribly.  Here are some of the types of guys (with my own attempt at humor inserted.)

  • The catfisher.  Everyone has heard about the catfisher.  He wants completely an online relationship. Probably lives in another city.  May ask for money. 
  • The pic collector. This guy has been around as long as the Internet has been online.  "Can you send me another picture?"  "That picture you sent me is not very clear.  Send another."  "I need a body/naked/ass picture before I meet up."  The pic collector always has a reason why he needs another picture of you but has sent none of himself. 
  • F is for Fake.  Why do guys do this?  They set up a fake profile.  Steal someone else's pictures.  Then they chat with you about meeting.  
  • The picture from 15 years ago guy.  He has pictures that are really old or they are taken from so far away you can't really see him.  He is embarrassed about his age or current physical shape.  Get over it dude. 
  • The A&F model.  File this in the "F" file for "fake".  He looks like an A&F model because the picture was from an A&F ad.
  • The tire kicker.  This guy is just checking things out.  Always.  You have a good chat and say "let's meet up".  He says "I'm not free now" or "I'm free next week sometime" or "Some other time".
  • The Something Better Might Come Along guy.  This guy likes you, but he does not "like you" like you.  So, he is waiting to see if he can arrange something better.  He will hit up you up later to meet but LONG after you have logged out.  This guy is related to the tire kicker. 
  • Blocks You When You Unlock guy.  This guy was expecting Brad Pitt and when you opened up and he say "Guy Next Door" he could not cope so he just blocked you.  What ever happened to, "I'm sorry I don't think it is a good match."
  • Mr. 8.5 Inches.  To read dating site profiles, you would think that all gay men are massively hung.  In Internet-world, the measuring stick starts reading it 2", not 0". 




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